You will encounter a variety of people along the path to progress. There are a number of personalities on your journey willing to provide assistance or to be an impediment to you. Six profiles are highlighted based on personal and group observations. They are the relaters, waiters, haters, traitors, debaters and spectators. No one is exclusively one profile all the time. You may vacillate among the characteristics depending on the situation and the people involved. It is important to identify these personalities in order to enlist their assistance or to avoid their negative attacks on your well-being and your ability to achieve outstanding results.
These individuals relate to your dreams, goals and aspirations. They are in sync with your mission to succeed. There is a connection, commitment and compatibility with your dream. They relate positively to your intentions and seeking the best for you. They are on the sidelines and in the game as supporters, cheerleaders and advocates. It warms your heart to look in your corner and see relaters wanting you to make it.
Waiters / Waitresses
Waiters and waitresses have ‘. They are not individuals hired by you, but people who voluntarily serve you on your journey. They are your friend, parents, teachers, coaches, mentors and positive peers. They may be anonymous or strangers say a kind word or perform a good deed. These individuals derive satisfaction from being of service to and being a part of the delegation responsible for your achievements.
I ran the Chicago Marathon twice and the streets were lined with people with signs encouraging the runners. They screamed out the numbers of the runners and some of them provided us with water and beverages. You may recall a waiter or waitress who gave you outstanding service. They asked poignant questions in order to serve you better. They went out of their way to make your visit an enjoyable and memorable experience.
You may have come in contact with these individuals. They are outwardly against you. They may be jealous, insecure or just plain malicious in their attitude toward you. You may not have done anything against these people, but they see you and immediately resent you and your accomplishments. Haters are committed to bringing you down. They celebrate and laugh when you stumble. They have the resentment to match your contentment and find great satisfaction whenever you experience difficulties. Haters are prone to go to great lengths to place barriers in front of you and to turn people against you. They are constantly questioning your motives, while developing conspiracy theories to discredit your work.
Haters are very dangerous because of their capacity to spread malicious lies, rumors while attacking your reputation. Their outward expression of contempt may not be to your face, but many people will be exposed to their feelings.
Traitors may get very close to you and win your confidence. You may trust them only to find out that they were false friends. They will work inwardly to unravel and discredit your progress to success. They will secretly try to undermine your efforts and tell people about your innermost secrets and weaknesses. Traitors may start out as relaters, but somewhere along the way they turn against you. Hopefully you will find out soon enough that they cannot be trusted. They are back biters and back stabbers. They may be passive aggressive, sneaky and secretive. Traitors may ruin your reputation by selling your secrets to the highest bidder.
Because traitors are believed to be your friends, their words ring with truth and credibility to an unsuspecting audience. Traitors will break your heart because of their proximity to your inner circle. They are on the inside and privy to your thoughts, feelings and actions.
While you are committed to your journey, you will find a number of people challenging you every step of the way. They try to talk you out of success. They will question your sacrifice and try to discourage you from wasting your time. They will give you countless counter arguments and examples of others who failed through no fault of their own. They will persistently challenge the value of your dreams and the foolishness of your work ethic. Debaters will make you question your intelligence and qualifications for your objectives.
Debaters, however, can strengthen your resolve and survival skills. When you successfully counter their arguments, you will be stronger against other opponents. They actually prepare you for meaningful discourse with the conscientious objectors who are against your desire to be successful.
In many respects your journey to succeed is a competitive event. There are spectators who are on the roadway in the field. There are other individuals who are in the stands watching the game. They do not get involved in the activities. They may cheer, but the cheers may not be for you. You may see the spectators in the stands, but you do not know their allegiance. You just know that they are present. They do not personally give you words of encouragement, as is the case with relaters and the waiters. You may not know if they are against you like the haters, debaters and the traitors.
Haters and traitors are potentially destructive. You need to find out who they are and develop strategies, structures and individuals to shield you from their insecurities. Haters and traitors attack you from different positions. Haters are outwardly against you. Traitors are inwardly against you. They gained your confidence and many times, you were unaware of their insidious nature.
Some debaters are convinced they are trying to protect you by talking you out of your dream. They may feel the dream is too dangerous and you may be hurt and they want to spare you the grief and humiliation associated with failing. However, many debaters are insecure and don’t want you to succeed because they will take it personally. If you succeed and they do not, they will see themselves as failures.
The spectators may be harmless, but they should be more than a witness along your path to progress. Spectators should get involved in the game and become relaters and waiters to support your cause. It is wonderful when spectators decide to be a part of the success of others. This service to others could be a major personal development growth opportunity on their path to becoming a leader.
These six personalities are present any time you try to accomplish something. They are the people you meet along the path to progress. The supportive personalities such as the relaters and waiters are essential to give you the moral support and technical proficiency, you need to succeed. Words of encouragement and acts of kindness from these individuals are instrumental in giving you the confidence and competence to achieve your goals.
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