A Call to Decency & Integrity (D&I)

April 21, 2020 ~ Orlando Ceaser

The 4th Monkey (3)

Decency is not a trade he frequently discuss. Yet, people know what it is when they see it. We would agree that people who are decent are trustworthy, with strong character traits, such as integrity. They are respected and held in high esteem. Decency is an acquired state. It is a function of diligence, conditioning, and a propensity to do the right thing. It is combination of characteristics, attitudes, and positive personal values, which causes people to gravitate to the as a magnet.

You may not have it as a goal, nonetheless it is a byproduct of being a good person. Decency is a positive side effect of good behavior. The individuals possess high moral standards and a solid reputation and track record.

Google defines decency as “behavior that conforms to accepted standards of morality or respectability.” It is often used in the context of someone being modest.

Decency surfaced on my first interview trip as a district sales manager. I was sent to help a district manager fill vacant sales of territories. The company had a structured interview program based on behavioral questions. We looked for competencies or behaviors necessary to do the job. Past performance / behavior was a predictor of future performance. Whereas there were no questions related to decency, it was evident, among the candidates.

One candidate rose to the top of my list. He had the requisite potential to be an outstanding sales rep. This was during a time when we were hiring recent college graduates for sales positions. There was one sales territory that was hard to fill. My favorite candidate evoked the word decency. He had the requisite skills, but I kept thinking, he is a thoroughly decent individual.

Decency translated into a culmination of many positive character traits. His overall demeanor was supported by quantifiable, specific behavior related outcomes.

Our interviewing questions covered such areas as presentation skills, product knowledge, administrative abilities, persuasion, teamwork, tenacity, resilience, creativity, and organizational skills.

Sandwiched between his answers were examples of

Fairness, equality, and good judgment
A hard-working personality
Faith centered living
Integrity and moral behavior with clients and competitors

Decency is an attribute, we relish in people who lead us, serve us, and befriend us. They have integrity which is characterized by the 4th Monkey (Shizaru) which is “Do No Evil”. Decency is not something we feel we can teach, but believe it was necessary for longevity and success in the long term. It may be a function of upbringing, conditioning, modeling behavior, practice, and reinforcement. Decency is often described as; you know it when you see it, or you can feel its presence in your gut.

In a highly competitive marketplace, decency can be a tiebreaker in hiring employees and building relationships and collaborations. We should determine whether candidates can play well in the sandbox, are good listeners and strong team players. They could essentially play well with others, driven by a sense of fairness and purpose, emotional intelligence, likability, and a desire to excel and achieve their inner greatness.

When we visually survey our workers and coworkers, if we find they have a sense of decency we could probably see the following.

Authenticity
Integrity
Honesty
Strong work ethic, based on productivity, quality and execution
Treats people fairly, with dignity and respect
Moral character as reflected in the stories they tell
A sense of fair play

Answer the following question. Are you a decent human being? How do you know this to be true? Asked the coworker, relative or friend if they would consider you a decent person. Ask for examples.

The decent human being is the team player that people like to work with and want on their teams. Strong character individuals are sought after in every interaction that is important to us. It is advantageous to associate with decent people and hire, develop and promote in our organizations.

Authenticity Messages from The Scrolls of Greatness™

August 27, 2019 ~ Orlando Ceaser

Mothermirrorlion1
There are countless archaeological discoveries that add to our knowledge of earlier civilizations, cultures and beliefs. You heard the stories of individuals stumbling upon a discovery, which greatly increased our knowledge. There may be scrolls of information in the earth that enlighten our paths.

There are scrolls of knowledge within you that validate your greatness. These texts confirm the greatness within you. The question is, how will you search through the caves, caverns and catacombs of memories and earlier instruction, to recover and discover knowledge and wisdom to achieve your grander purpose.

There are messages on authenticity that I gleaned from my excavations. They will ultimately be published in a future work entitled Scrolls of Greatness.

An Authentic Life

“Is your life a quotation or a paraphrase of the life of another or is it the original authentic paragraph God has written for you to include in His magnificent manuscript?”

Authentic Faith

“Most of your knowledge is based on faith. You were exposed to information packaged and provided to you by strangers and people you know. You are placing a lot of faith and trust in the character, motives and authenticity of others, which is the way it should be, because you cannot verify everything.”

Authentic, Non-manipulative Love

People should know that you genuinely love them; authenticity without manipulation. You want them to be happy, expecting nothing in return, no strings attached. I told a group of students that I drove an hour and a half to speak to them and I was not being paid for it. I wanted them to know that there are people who love them and expect nothing in return, but their excellence. We must learn to give back and I was compelled to do this, because it was done for me. “A young man spoke,” I wouldn’t do it, if I was not getting paid for it.” I responded, “If you thought as highly of you, as I think of you, you would do it, because I know you are worth it.”

Forgiveness

“Forgiveness should not dependent on receiving an apology or the knowledge of an impending apology. It may not be automatic. It may be difficult. But it should be authentic when experienced and expressed.”

Observations

“Many times, your words should serve as an observation and not a critique. However, there will be times when the order should be reversed. Authenticity improves the power of your communication.”

Share the Journey

“My message seems more powerful when I profile my pain. When I accept the blame,
I seem human. When I discuss my shame, I am vulnerable and real. People relate and identify with me when they can connect and feel that I am genuine, with good intentions.

Sometimes we do our journey a disservice when people only see the finished product and not the rough parts of our development. A glimpse into the construction, deconstruction, destruction and production processes, will heighten their awareness and appreciation of our struggles and what it takes to be successful. We will connect. The authenticity of raw, without disclaimers, and revealing our flaws, will open people to our stories and increase our chances to inspire growth.

The world wants to know how we made our names, the obstacles faced and how we overcame. Otherwise, people will surmise, we obtained the prize and never made mistakes, always received the breaks, were never afraid, that we possess a passing grade, but it was easy, and we always had it made.”

5 Self Restraining Tendencies (SRT’s) That Can Hurt You

January 8, 2016 ~ Orlando Ceaser

We are human and therefore, have idiosyncrasies, nuances and eccentricities that come with our personalities. Many of these unique characteristics position us for survival and success. But some of these peculiarities are counterproductive and are detrimental to our growth. I will call them self restraining tendencies or SRT’s. They are not necessarily life-threatening, but they may serve as impediments to development.

SRT’s are indigenous to human beings. They may be formed by life experiences and thoughts and subsequently create insecurities. They may be pseudo-defense mechanisms to allegedly protect us. SRT’s may be categorized as bad habits that may hold us back, restrict growth or work against us. How do we know we have them? Self assessments and times of reflection can increase self awareness and reveal SRT’s, as we examine our lives and impact on others. Additionally, we may receive the gift of honesty from a friend through candid comments. Constant feedback from co-workers, parents and peers can also be useful by adding to our enlightenment. But, we must be objective, receptive and appreciative of their candor.

5 Self Restraining Tendencies (SRT’s)

Procrastination
Poor communication skills
Negativity mindset
Toxic people skills
Lack of Integrity

1. Procrastination

It is interesting to learn that many people are struggling with procrastination. The act of postponing things until later is not intellectually difficult for people to understand. They know that something should be done immediately and to postpone will have consequences. But, nevertheless, they still will delay until later, that which should be done today.

We recognize that we may not feel like doing something right now or we have awarded a greater priority to something else. If we continue to kick the can down the road or delay the inevitable, we will continue to waste time and effort and increase the amount of stress in our lives.

Lisa was interviewing for a job as a pharmaceutical sales representative. She felt very comfortable with the interview. The interviewer asked her about her number one shortcoming. She responded, “I am a procrastinator. I get things done, but sometimes it takes me a while to get started.” Procrastination was her Self Restraining Tendency, but the interview may not be the right place to disclose this particular self restraining tendency.

2. Poor communication skills

Communicating is something we do every day. It is the currency by which we interact with people in order to state our ideas, convey instructions and build relationships. Those among us, who communicate effectively, actually have an advantage at school, in our careers and in relationships. If we are hampered by poor communication skills, our effectiveness is restricted. This self restraining tendency, like the others featured in this article, must be identified and corrected.

Poor communication skills could be non verbal or verbal to include written, body language and group presentations. Ask yourself, “Am I plagued by poor communication skills? Are there aspects of my communication ability that are hindering my progress?” Conduct a self-assessment. Diagnose your communication ability to see if there is a deficiency. You may seek to solicit feedback from respected sources and trusted friends and colleagues to see if they can identify areas that require improvement. When the SRT is disclosed, a change management process should be initiated. However, rather than go through multiple steps to change we should go directly from denial to acceptance and put a plan in place to correct the SRT.

3. Negativity Mindset

People who have a negativity mindset are not necessarily the individuals who look at the pros and cons of every situation. I am speaking of the people who like to rain on the parade. When the entire group has decided to move in a positive direction, they are the naysayers who constantly focus on what is or could go wrong. They provide excuses rather than explanations. They seldom do anything but complain without the slightest contribution to positive constructive participation to change anything.

4. Toxic people skills

The toxic people SRT is different from the poor communication skills mentioned earlier. Individuals prone to this tendency will use power to humiliate and intimidate in order to gain the upper hand or to create an environment of fear.

My son worked for an organization where the new boss actually said, “When I walk into a room I want people to fear me.” He wanted people to be intimidated by his presence. This attitude is supported by language and interactions that cause stress, a lack of trust, poor engagement and ultimately subpar performance. Individuals with toxic people skills may speak about people behind their backs, pit coworkers against each other and generate an atmosphere of tension.

People with toxic people skills may be cursed with the propensity to enter every interaction with a transaction mindset. They are constantly thinking what is in it for them, how can they beat the other person by any means necessary and how it can only help them succeed. This is prevalent in relationships where they only socialize or interact with people who can help them advance their position, today.

5. Lack of Integrity

People with a lack of integrity are flawed in their relational and work performance. They utilize a winning at all cost or any cost approach to work and relationships. People with this tendency view the rules as an inconvenience, something for weak minded people, to be broken and circumvented whenever possible. Breaking rules is seen as a badge of honor, a necessary evil to give themselves the ultimate advantage toward victory.

Invariably, this SRT will cause the downfall of their career and reputation. Oftentimes, the integrity flaw does not manifest itself until well into a person’s career. Please find below a chart illustrating a natural career growth curve and the various points of indiscretion where a lack of integrity can doom a person’s career.

If a lack of integrity shows itself at the end of someone’s career, a lot of their positive contributions can be discounted and shrouded in suspicion, nullifying their reputation. If a lack of integrity revealed itself early in someone’s career, they may never have the opportunity to make significant positive contributions or to realize the potential present in their talents and abilities.

Ideally, we should establish self restraining orders or SROs for those character traits which are limiting our joy and effectiveness. The five self restraining tendencies listed or others should be addressed if they are a problem for you. They have the capacity to limit your effectiveness and keep you away from realizing your full potential in every segment of your life.

What do Ambitious People Want?

September 16, 2015 ~ Orlando Ceaser

Conversations with ambitious people who want to embark upon an ad venture leading to success, revealed at least six attributes that describe their appetite for achievement.

The attributes are access, acknowledgment, acceptance, appreciation, advocates and awards.

Access

Ambitious people want unfettered, unrestricted access to key people, resources, and information that can help their careers. The resources could be information, data, budgets and expertise. They know that relationships and networking are important to job acquisition and promotions. Salespeople think,” If I can see them, I can sell them.” Ambitious people want the keys to unlock the doors to opportunity.

People want access to key developmental opportunities, assignments and high visibility projects that will hone their skills and prepare them to assume additional responsibilities. Ambitious people want access to meaningful work and connections to mentors, coaches and the senior leaders who can ultimately influence their careers.

Acknowledgment

Ambitious people want to be acknowledged, once they are around and gain access. They want to be recognized and feel like a part of the team. Recognition as an attribute means simply to notice them, sense their presence and smile or nod in their direction. They want common courtesies through greetings and eye contact. People want to feel as if they are a part of something very special. It is not always necessary to remember their names, but that would be a nice touch. A smile in their direction while walking in the hallways signals to people that you know that they are there. No one likes to feel invisible, so when leaders find a way to acknowledge and identify someone it is very well received.

Acceptance

Everyone wants to be accepted and included. If a leader in the organization taps into a person’s need to be accepted they will feel valued, relevant and necessary. They will feel a part of something bigger than themselves and this will enrich their time at work. They can feel accepted when invited to functions after work and involved in social activities. When they feel welcome, they feel as if they belong. It is one thing for an organization to talk about inclusion, but the proof is in the daily practices of its members to involve everyone in activities beneficial to the organization.

When people are accepted, they feel as if they are wanted and this can contribute to higher statistics on engagement, productivity and job satisfaction.

Appreciation

People like to feel their work has value; is noticed and essential to the enterprise. When leaders or the organization finds ways to say “thank you”, people remember. A senior leader wrote a poem to his sales organization and received numerous positive responses from the team. In addition to the other awards they receive at year end, one person said,” My manager took to time to write something special to show his appreciation.”

Employees enjoy when managers demonstrate actions, not just words to prove that their people are their most important resource in the company. Programs are put in place that minimize workload and attempt to ease the tension between work and their personal life. It is often very difficult to achieve work/life balance. Some organizations refer to it as work life effectiveness or a blending between work and home. Feedback is given consistently, not just at the end of the year, to ensure that employees know where they stand relative to their performance expectations. They are told the truth in a fair and candid manner, which builds trust. Not only are people appreciate, but they are respected and their opinions are solicited.

Think of ways to say or show your appreciation. It can involve little things like thank you cards, hand written notes, bonuses, time off or special celebrations. There are numerous ways to show gratitude and these will go a long way to making people see that managers care about them as individuals.

Advocates

Ambitious people love to rise within the organization. They want to be known and supported by individuals who can advance their careers. They want mentors who will speak up on their behalf in personnel meetings. They want people to put in a good word for them when assignments are being discussed. They want supporters, cheerleaders, mentors, coaches and sponsors. When they are doing a good job, they want the managers to sing their praises from the rooftop. They want people to run interference for them on their way to other assignments. In meetings when people are quoting misinformation about their performance, they want someone present who will set the record straight.

Ambitious people love advocates. These individuals can have a positive impact on their financial status and their ability to be successful on the job. When individuals within the company and outside the organization learn about positions, advocates are invaluable to deliver positive comments about your personality, work ethic and capabilities.

Awards

Everyone likes to be rewarded and recognized when their performance meets and exceeds expectations. These awards can be in the form of pay increases, additional responsibility and kind words delivered in the presence of your peers. People want to feel acknowledged, accepted and appreciated. These three attribute can be considered awards for showing up at work and delivering results at a very high level. When access is provided and advocates communicate and celebrate your performance, awards in the form of certificates, pay increases, promotional opportunities and developmental assignments is a great way to show that the organization understands the importance of cultivating a motivated workforce.

The six attributes stated in this article answers the question, “What do ambitious people want?” An argument can be made that not only are the six attributes what ambitious people want, but everyone in the company want the same things. Everybody wants to be respected, rewarded and recognized, as well as to be supported and mentored. Ambitious people and those not interested in climbing the company ladder want to enjoy work and feel they are making a difference, as a part of something significant, where they are playing an important role.

Authenticity – From Impressionist to Your Authentic Self*

May 11, 2015 ~ Orlando Ceaser

The path to understanding people will lead to greater personal awareness. There are 4 roles you may encounter during your developmental journey. Several contain character traits and skills commonly associated with actors and other performers. The 4 portraits can be seen as roles played that can influence personality styles and overall performance. They are the impressionist, impersonator, imposter and the authentic self. Knowledge of these images and the ability to adjust to them will enable you to adapt and survive in business and social situations.

Impressionist

The impressionist likes to imitate or model someone they admire. They may copy their speech patterns, mannerisms, key phrases, behaviors or routines. The television show Saturday Night Live garners huge ratings during presidential elections. Their actors do a fantastic job with impressions of the political candidates. Actresses Tina Fey and Amy Poehler’s impressions of Sarah Palin and Hillary Clinton were performed to perfection and rave reviews.

People may accidentally or intentionally model character traits that are synonymous with someone else. Some will select a person and duplicate the way they make decisions or perform their jobs. Individuals may stand like them or speak like them and conduct meetings the way they do. Additionally, they may be drawn to someone’s excellence and decide to emulate a particular characteristic in order to make it their own.

There is a danger in randomly and haphazardly imitating too many people. A person may lose their own identity. Rich Little a famous impressionist who made a living imitating famous entertainers once said, “I have done so many impressions I sometimes forget what my voice sounds like. It is true that we are a composite of many people but we must be strategic and systematic and how we inculcate their traits into our personality. We must be consistent with our true nature and not forget who we are.

Professional development can be helped by utilizing the appropriate impressions. In the early days of my career I worked in the Sales Department, where I had to make decisions when my boss was on vacation. I would ask myself, “How would John handle this particular situation or what would John do if faced with the same set of circumstances?” I would use the same wording and try to deliver messages with the same tone, emphasis and authority, as I imagined John would do it. My impression of John’s decision-making was instrumental in my growth and development.

We are all impressionable and prone to mirror and match behavior. We assume these impressionist tendencies to cope with our environment. This is how we survive and grow. One of the side effects of our impressions is that we may be accused of kissing up to management or trying to gain special favors by being the teacher’s pet.

Impersonator

An impersonator is an impressionist who is totally immersed in a role. They may temporarily abandon their identity and put on another persona. You have seen female impersonators, Elvis impersonators, individuals who impersonate presidents and other political figures. They may go to great lengths to excel and playing the part. We hired a guest speaker who was an impersonator of former president Bill Clinton. He looked like him, spoke like him and had the similar mannerisms. We wondered if he naturally looked like the former president or were enhancements necessary to project that appearance. It may take tremendous sacrifice to stay in character.

Impersonators may eat, sleep, think and act like the person they are imitating. They may assume the person’s name in public. They lose their identity and put on the image and character of another. They will conduct their daily activities from the vantage point of how would that person perform an activity or live their lives. They may give up their own ideas and opinions to become the other person, thus paying tribute to their idol.

Organizations have been known to promote clones of their top executives. This is the epitome of advertising to their employees, the value of impersonating and projecting the corporate image.

You must be careful. Do not surrender your personality to play a role. If you abandon your key traits and characteristics to assume the role of another you have denied yourself the right to fully express your gifts. You cannot fool people into thinking you are the original and you will deprive the world of your authentic self. Remember, a copy will never be a superior representation of the original.

The use of the impersonator style may be due to the image that is rewarded in the organization. People reproduce what is rewarded and what the organization really wants to see. Being an impersonator could also be as innocent as not feeling safe or appreciated by the company. The use of the impersonator style is typically designed to gain a personal benefit. It is often used to please someone in power with your ability to pattern your behavior after their professional image. You may be seeking a mentor/protégé relationship. You are hopeful that they in turn will generously lavish you with special favors or recognition.

Imposter

The imposter is based on misrepresentation. They claim to be someone or something they are not. They present an image that is inauthentic, false or misleading. This is easy to see on the movie screen or in television shows where the person assumes the identity of a dead person or through examples of identity theft, where someone assumes another person’s identity to steal their money.

However, an imposter is difficult to see in business and in your relationships, especially if we want to believe they are who they claim to be. Hopefully, we find out about their deception before significant damage is done.

The imposter in an interview misrepresents their personal history. They may assume the personality of someone they think the employer is wishing to hire. They may profess credentials, such as degrees, skills or connections that are nonexistent. They present themselves with high integrity and character which are far from their real values and personality. The imposter is a liar and will do anything to fool you into thinking their façade is their true image or actual position on an important matter.

Years ago one of our offices on the West coast hired a person they were pleased to bring on board. They said she was intelligent, beautiful and articulate with an electric personality. When she arrived at the office to sign up for the company orientation they were surprised by her calm, demure and low keyed demeanor. She was introverted and had little to say, which was a concern since she had to make presentations to physicians. They felt something was wrong, but they couldn’t explain it.

At the end of the second day of her orientation she mentioned that she was going to meet her sister for dinner. She introduced her sister to the group. You guessed it. It was her twin sister. She was equally beautiful, articulate and intelligent with an electric personality. They wondered if they had hired an imposter. Most cases of imposters are not this dramatic.

When an imposter is discovered, justice is usually swift. The person is confronted, embarrassed and fired. Their reputation is ruined and many people may be hurt in the process. If you are tempted to pose as an imposter, remember, the results are rarely positive. The masquerade is seldom worth the pain and embarrassment when you are exposed.

Authentic Self

The authentic self should be the desired objective or personality style. You should be vigilante and remain true to your real character and true self. The authentic self is who we really are. It is true that we may model some of our behavior after the three earlier models. However, this is done to enhance not to misrepresent your authentic self.

We are a composite a combination of many factors woven together to form a distinct creation with the potential to achieve phenomenal results. If we feel threatened we will be reluctant to bring our whole selves to work because it may be used against us. This fear is a challenge to authenticity and may tempt us to be an impressionist, impersonator or imposter to ensure our survival.

You will find out that there is no substitute to being authentic. The refreshing satisfaction of fulfilling your purpose will grant you the peace you need to joy the success of the life lived to the fullest with integrity.

*Excerpt from Unlock Your Diversity Greatness, release date 4^th quarter of 2015

4 Directives to Influence Behavior

October 17, 2014 ~ Orlando Ceaser

Instructions since childhood were designed to teach and guide us. Over the years we have noticed remarkable similarities between the directives given in our youth and the requests made of us as adults. In retrospect, their effectiveness varied based on our circumstances and development level. The same is true at work. Leaders and managers give instructions using the same memorable phrases. The objective of these phrases is to elicit our compliance with their demands, commands or requests for action.

“Do as I say, because I said so”

People have used a variety of commands to get the kind of behavior they want. “Do as I say, because I said so,” is the classic power phrase of authority. Parents use it often. The power can be based on position, where they can administer rewards or punishment if someone fails to comply with their request. The sentence could easily end with,” or else.” The job, held by the speaker, confers position power. They are the boss, the parent, the person in charge and when they speak they want others to jump quickly into action. The person using this phrase does not wish to be questioned or challenged. People will also use the specter of fear, brute force, physical strength and threats to persuade people to fall in line. Threats may be physical or assaults to someone’s character or reputation.

Frustrated parents and managers have used this phrase when they run out of answers. When they are busy or in a hurry, they resort to this language to end conversations. They do not want to discuss the matter anymore. They want people to listen, obey and stay quiet.

“Do as I say, because I said so,” is a technique that can influence a number of people. When matched to the right individuals, it is very effective. It is useless when delivered to the wrong person.

“Do as I say, not as I do”

Some people adopt a hypocritical style to exert influence on others. They recognize that they don’t have the discipline or integrity to practice what they preach. Yet, they insist that others listen and obey their dictates and commands. This works in situations stated in example number one, however, the inconsistency and hypocrisy will render it ineffective in some cases. The resistant ones will not comply and they will use the leader’s hypocrisy as justification for refusing to follow their commands.

There is a certain amount of arrogance associated with telling someone to do something that you are not committed to do. The advice may be solid, but the absence of following your own advice, may compromise its impact. They may do what you say, but only when you are watching.

A powerful story was told about Mahatma Gandhi at http://www.witandwisdomstories.com. The blog post “Mahatma Gandhi’s salt less diet” contains the following story. “One day an anxious mother, along with her son visited Mahatma Gandhi. She told Bapuji, “My son is suffering from a kidney disease, Bapuji. I am really concerned. I took him to the doctor and the doctor has advised him to take food without salt.” She continued, “the problem Bapuji is my son refuses to follow the doctor’s orders, but if you tell him he will listen as he worships you and he will not deny you.” The Mahatma asked the mother and son to see him after a week.

After a week or so, Mahatma Gandhi called the mother and the son to his house. He took the boy aside and looked him in the eye and said” You are very important for your mother’s happiness and your health worries her. It is my wish that you follow doctor’s orders and stop taking salt in your diet.”

The boy who was in awe of the Mahatma was so pleased with the Mahatma worrying about him, agreed at once. He turned to his mother and said” no more salt for me Ma.”

The relieved mother stood puzzled for a while and asked Gandhi “But Bapuji, you could have told him this when we came a week ago, why didn’t you?”

To this Gandhi replied, ”But madam at that time I was taking salt in my diet and it has taken a week for me to give up salt myself. How can I advice your son to eat a diet without salt with a clear conscience? How can I tell someone to do something which I myself do not practice?”

Hypocrisy will not be tolerated in today’s climate of transparency and authenticity. Some will follow this request, but must see the benefit or fear the speaker.

“Don’t do what I did – Learn from my mistakes”

It is well-known that experience can be the best teacher. Rebellion is a natural part of the human spirit. Many of us have received instruction, but elected to ignore it to listen to our own voice or the voices of others. Going down the wrong path has caused us discomfort and ultimately we realized we were wrong. Armed with the experience, we wish to let others know the value of staying on the right path. We don’t want them making the same errors in judgment that plagued our lives. We therefore, become an ambassador for the truth. We say to people,” Don’t do what I did. Learn from my mistakes.”

This is sometimes seen as a tough love message or using scare tactics. Former prisoners have used a” scared straight” philosophy to convince youth to stay away from a life of crime. They feel that education on the negatives associated with criminal activity would discourage youth from hanging with the wrong crowd and making questionable decisions. They take the glamour out of disobedience and use their lives as proof.

Conversations in a corporation may involve older employees telling younger employees about the mistakes they made. These mentoring sessions or coaching moments are an effort to steer less tenured employees toward making better decisions on their career path. There is value in information sharing. That occurs when the different generations in the workplace tell their stories of arrival and survival within the context of the organization.

This approach also works on some people, but not on others. There will always be people who think they are too smart, clever, intellectual, lucky, cool or too good-looking to suffer the consequences of their actions. They will view the sad story, as something that only applies to others.

“Do it like I did it – Follow my lead”

This is normally a very potent approach. It is the lead by positive example model. People will look at you, your reputation and your execution and realize the value of your words and actions. Learning occurs through imitation or modeling behavior. “Let me show you how it’s done, makes “Do it like I did it ” even more powerful. Many times, “Do it like I did it” and follow my example, is not verbalized. Yes, there are many occasions where people will issue these words to give a standard to follow, but often its power is in seeing someone act out the phrase. It is the practice that occurs with or without the preaching that makes it work. It is the example exhibited on a day-to-day basis.

Most of the time, “Do it like I did it” and “Follow my example” are positive exhortations. But, it may not work in all cases. People will imitate and follow negative leaders and negative examples. If the culture of an organization is filled with intimidation and a lack of appreciation, individuals desiring to be leaders will pick up on the signals. They will emulate the same kind of insensitivity broadcast by their leaders.

However, leading by example does not work on everyone. Someone will find a way to discredit your work or assign your accomplishments to favoritism or inequality, they cannot duplicate. These 4 directives to influence behavior collectively have been used to get individuals and groups to act and follow orders. They are spoken to move people to action. However, individually, we have found that they may not work on everyone all the time.

Managing Up – Part 2 (The Manager’s Perspective)

March 12, 2013 ~ Orlando Ceaser

Managers can recount individuals and situations where they felt employees did an excellent job of managing up. The person did not seem manipulative, arrogant or self-centered regarding their career. They demonstrated many of the attributes mentioned earlier in the “Do” category and did not participate in the “Don’t” area at all. Many times they shared similar interests, but were not clones or mini me’s from the Austin Powers movie. They direct reports contained some of the following qualities;

Brought something intriguing to the table, with special qualities or contributions
Provided information about the job, concerning the workplace and on the industry
Reliable and could be counted on to follow through on assignments
Performed their jobs well, exceeding expectations
Took an interest in the manager’s job
Make the manager and the team look good, drawing rave reviews from many in senior leadership
Authentic in their approach to the job and their clients
Could be trusted to tell the truth regardless of the consequence

The manager is the manager because they like to get things accomplished. They are aware that some people are inauthentic in relating to them. Because the manager has input into hiring, performance reviews, compensation and terminations, employees tend to be guarded even when they have an open door policy. Many employees genuinely stated their opinions and intentions, whereas others are playing games, telling a manager what they think they want to hear, to win praise and recognition.

The Know System™ for decision-making was featured in the book, The Isle of Knowledge (available on http://www.amazon.com). The Isle of Knowledge is a fable set in the South Pacific with the hero on a journey of enlightenment, to better decisions. He is mesmerized by the journey and the inhabitants on his quest to ask the right questions to make better decisions. The Isle of Knowledge contains a methodology to help people manage up in an easy to follow series of questions.

The Know System is based on the word Know. If you use the four letters in the word Know you will have a system to gather information. Take out a sheet of paper or your computer, smart phone or tablet. Write Know at the top of the page or screen. Begin writing the words that come to mind. Be generous with the rules, but only use the letters from Know. You will arrive at the following words that are useful for this exercise;

Know, Won, Now, No, On, Own, OK, Ow, Wo, Wok, KO

Know

A skillful employee will start off asking questions to learn about themselves (self-awareness) and their manager. What do they know and what do they need to know? They may use Who, What, Where, Why, When and How to gather the information they need on personal and manager goals, values and interests. Who can give them information on the manager when they are conducting their interviews to learn about the manager’s habits and history?

Won

Self awareness will give them their goals and objectives. If they managed up effectively, what would their world look like? How would they feel, what would they gain from it? How can they make it a win / win where the individual and manager’s goals are reached?

Now

What are they doing now to manage up? Are their techniques the right ones? Are their techniques consistent with their goals? Are there aspects of their performance and personality that are forming a barrier? Are they operating with the right priorities and set of objectives?

We recognize there are some things they must remove from their activity list. They must say ‘No” to some things. They cannot say yes to everything and reach their goals. They may reach burnout unless guidelines are put in place. There are sections that are frowned upon by your manager; you may feel it is advantageous to be on the same wavelength. There are procedures you have said yes to that requires a change of heart and direction.

You must be on at all times. Authenticity is required as we stated earlier, but you must also be persistent and consistent. When you are on message, on target and on fire, you create a barrier to ward off those elements that try to distract you. There are negative people who will try to bring you down as well as your manager; you need to make sure you don’t inadvertently toss your manager under the bus.

Own

You will be held accountable for your actions. You are responsible for your career and your daily performance. The relationship with the manager is largely up to you. If you adopt this mindset, you will take the necessary steps to make it a success.

OK, Ow & Wo

If you are doing a poor job at managing up, this Ok performance is not satisfactory in the long-term. Jim Collins in his book Good to Great said “Good is the enemy of excellence.’ If good is the enemy, Ok cannot be far behind. The only time Ok is satisfactory is on a checklist. If you have a list of the areas you want to cover, to manage up effectively, OK will work marvelously, as a confirmation that an item is completed.

Ow is the sound we make when we are in pain. Sometimes pain says we are doing the wrong thing or we are doing the thing wrong. Pain also is the discomfort we go through anytime we do something different or we change. Some of the strategies in managing up maybe new and difficult and the awkward nature may seem painful. Soon they will be a part of your repertoire and beneficial in helping you manage up.

Wo is the sound you hear when people want to slow down a horse. This can apply to us, if we are going too fast, implementing too many techniques. You may need to reduce the list to a manageable number of actions and only add when you mastered a few at a time.

Wok

Sometimes you have to stir things up a bit when you institute variety and change. Just because you have always acted a certain way does not mean that you always have to act that way. Variety is the spice of life and makes flexibility a breath of fresh air. Innovative techniques are ways to endear you to a manager and become an indispensable part of her inner circle.

If you are not successful at managing up, it is safe to say, your failure could knock you out of the running for whatever goal you want to accomplish.

Managing up is a skill set that is built on relationships and high performance. You may institute many of these practices and still not be invited into the manager’s inner circle. You may try them and the relationship with your manager is still distant and cold, but it is your responsibility to make every effort to make this work. The manager has a lot of power and influence over many aspects of your career. You can make a difference in showing them you are an indispensable member of the team, who rallies to make them look good, has their back and able to help them achieve their goals and objectives.