5 Self Restraining Tendencies (SRT’s) That Can Hurt You

January 8, 2016 ~ Orlando Ceaser

We are human and therefore, have idiosyncrasies, nuances and eccentricities that come with our personalities. Many of these unique characteristics position us for survival and success. But some of these peculiarities are counterproductive and are detrimental to our growth. I will call them self restraining tendencies or SRT’s. They are not necessarily life-threatening, but they may serve as impediments to development.

SRT’s are indigenous to human beings. They may be formed by life experiences and thoughts and subsequently create insecurities. They may be pseudo-defense mechanisms to allegedly protect us. SRT’s may be categorized as bad habits that may hold us back, restrict growth or work against us. How do we know we have them? Self assessments and times of reflection can increase self awareness and reveal SRT’s, as we examine our lives and impact on others. Additionally, we may receive the gift of honesty from a friend through candid comments. Constant feedback from co-workers, parents and peers can also be useful by adding to our enlightenment. But, we must be objective, receptive and appreciative of their candor.

5 Self Restraining Tendencies (SRT’s)

Procrastination
Poor communication skills
Negativity mindset
Toxic people skills
Lack of Integrity

1. Procrastination

It is interesting to learn that many people are struggling with procrastination. The act of postponing things until later is not intellectually difficult for people to understand. They know that something should be done immediately and to postpone will have consequences. But, nevertheless, they still will delay until later, that which should be done today.

We recognize that we may not feel like doing something right now or we have awarded a greater priority to something else. If we continue to kick the can down the road or delay the inevitable, we will continue to waste time and effort and increase the amount of stress in our lives.

Lisa was interviewing for a job as a pharmaceutical sales representative. She felt very comfortable with the interview. The interviewer asked her about her number one shortcoming. She responded, “I am a procrastinator. I get things done, but sometimes it takes me a while to get started.” Procrastination was her Self Restraining Tendency, but the interview may not be the right place to disclose this particular self restraining tendency.

2. Poor communication skills

Communicating is something we do every day. It is the currency by which we interact with people in order to state our ideas, convey instructions and build relationships. Those among us, who communicate effectively, actually have an advantage at school, in our careers and in relationships. If we are hampered by poor communication skills, our effectiveness is restricted. This self restraining tendency, like the others featured in this article, must be identified and corrected.

Poor communication skills could be non verbal or verbal to include written, body language and group presentations. Ask yourself, “Am I plagued by poor communication skills? Are there aspects of my communication ability that are hindering my progress?” Conduct a self-assessment. Diagnose your communication ability to see if there is a deficiency. You may seek to solicit feedback from respected sources and trusted friends and colleagues to see if they can identify areas that require improvement. When the SRT is disclosed, a change management process should be initiated. However, rather than go through multiple steps to change we should go directly from denial to acceptance and put a plan in place to correct the SRT.

3. Negativity Mindset

People who have a negativity mindset are not necessarily the individuals who look at the pros and cons of every situation. I am speaking of the people who like to rain on the parade. When the entire group has decided to move in a positive direction, they are the naysayers who constantly focus on what is or could go wrong. They provide excuses rather than explanations. They seldom do anything but complain without the slightest contribution to positive constructive participation to change anything.

4. Toxic people skills

The toxic people SRT is different from the poor communication skills mentioned earlier. Individuals prone to this tendency will use power to humiliate and intimidate in order to gain the upper hand or to create an environment of fear.

My son worked for an organization where the new boss actually said, “When I walk into a room I want people to fear me.” He wanted people to be intimidated by his presence. This attitude is supported by language and interactions that cause stress, a lack of trust, poor engagement and ultimately subpar performance. Individuals with toxic people skills may speak about people behind their backs, pit coworkers against each other and generate an atmosphere of tension.

People with toxic people skills may be cursed with the propensity to enter every interaction with a transaction mindset. They are constantly thinking what is in it for them, how can they beat the other person by any means necessary and how it can only help them succeed. This is prevalent in relationships where they only socialize or interact with people who can help them advance their position, today.

5. Lack of Integrity

People with a lack of integrity are flawed in their relational and work performance. They utilize a winning at all cost or any cost approach to work and relationships. People with this tendency view the rules as an inconvenience, something for weak minded people, to be broken and circumvented whenever possible. Breaking rules is seen as a badge of honor, a necessary evil to give themselves the ultimate advantage toward victory.

Invariably, this SRT will cause the downfall of their career and reputation. Oftentimes, the integrity flaw does not manifest itself until well into a person’s career. Please find below a chart illustrating a natural career growth curve and the various points of indiscretion where a lack of integrity can doom a person’s career.

If a lack of integrity shows itself at the end of someone’s career, a lot of their positive contributions can be discounted and shrouded in suspicion, nullifying their reputation. If a lack of integrity revealed itself early in someone’s career, they may never have the opportunity to make significant positive contributions or to realize the potential present in their talents and abilities.

Ideally, we should establish self restraining orders or SROs for those character traits which are limiting our joy and effectiveness. The five self restraining tendencies listed or others should be addressed if they are a problem for you. They have the capacity to limit your effectiveness and keep you away from realizing your full potential in every segment of your life.

What do Ambitious People Want?

September 16, 2015 ~ Orlando Ceaser

Conversations with ambitious people who want to embark upon an ad venture leading to success, revealed at least six attributes that describe their appetite for achievement.

The attributes are access, acknowledgment, acceptance, appreciation, advocates and awards.

Access

Ambitious people want unfettered, unrestricted access to key people, resources, and information that can help their careers. The resources could be information, data, budgets and expertise. They know that relationships and networking are important to job acquisition and promotions. Salespeople think,” If I can see them, I can sell them.” Ambitious people want the keys to unlock the doors to opportunity.

People want access to key developmental opportunities, assignments and high visibility projects that will hone their skills and prepare them to assume additional responsibilities. Ambitious people want access to meaningful work and connections to mentors, coaches and the senior leaders who can ultimately influence their careers.

Acknowledgment

Ambitious people want to be acknowledged, once they are around and gain access. They want to be recognized and feel like a part of the team. Recognition as an attribute means simply to notice them, sense their presence and smile or nod in their direction. They want common courtesies through greetings and eye contact. People want to feel as if they are a part of something very special. It is not always necessary to remember their names, but that would be a nice touch. A smile in their direction while walking in the hallways signals to people that you know that they are there. No one likes to feel invisible, so when leaders find a way to acknowledge and identify someone it is very well received.

Acceptance

Everyone wants to be accepted and included. If a leader in the organization taps into a person’s need to be accepted they will feel valued, relevant and necessary. They will feel a part of something bigger than themselves and this will enrich their time at work. They can feel accepted when invited to functions after work and involved in social activities. When they feel welcome, they feel as if they belong. It is one thing for an organization to talk about inclusion, but the proof is in the daily practices of its members to involve everyone in activities beneficial to the organization.

When people are accepted, they feel as if they are wanted and this can contribute to higher statistics on engagement, productivity and job satisfaction.

Appreciation

People like to feel their work has value; is noticed and essential to the enterprise. When leaders or the organization finds ways to say “thank you”, people remember. A senior leader wrote a poem to his sales organization and received numerous positive responses from the team. In addition to the other awards they receive at year end, one person said,” My manager took to time to write something special to show his appreciation.”

Employees enjoy when managers demonstrate actions, not just words to prove that their people are their most important resource in the company. Programs are put in place that minimize workload and attempt to ease the tension between work and their personal life. It is often very difficult to achieve work/life balance. Some organizations refer to it as work life effectiveness or a blending between work and home. Feedback is given consistently, not just at the end of the year, to ensure that employees know where they stand relative to their performance expectations. They are told the truth in a fair and candid manner, which builds trust. Not only are people appreciate, but they are respected and their opinions are solicited.

Think of ways to say or show your appreciation. It can involve little things like thank you cards, hand written notes, bonuses, time off or special celebrations. There are numerous ways to show gratitude and these will go a long way to making people see that managers care about them as individuals.

Advocates

Ambitious people love to rise within the organization. They want to be known and supported by individuals who can advance their careers. They want mentors who will speak up on their behalf in personnel meetings. They want people to put in a good word for them when assignments are being discussed. They want supporters, cheerleaders, mentors, coaches and sponsors. When they are doing a good job, they want the managers to sing their praises from the rooftop. They want people to run interference for them on their way to other assignments. In meetings when people are quoting misinformation about their performance, they want someone present who will set the record straight.

Ambitious people love advocates. These individuals can have a positive impact on their financial status and their ability to be successful on the job. When individuals within the company and outside the organization learn about positions, advocates are invaluable to deliver positive comments about your personality, work ethic and capabilities.

Awards

Everyone likes to be rewarded and recognized when their performance meets and exceeds expectations. These awards can be in the form of pay increases, additional responsibility and kind words delivered in the presence of your peers. People want to feel acknowledged, accepted and appreciated. These three attribute can be considered awards for showing up at work and delivering results at a very high level. When access is provided and advocates communicate and celebrate your performance, awards in the form of certificates, pay increases, promotional opportunities and developmental assignments is a great way to show that the organization understands the importance of cultivating a motivated workforce.

The six attributes stated in this article answers the question, “What do ambitious people want?” An argument can be made that not only are the six attributes what ambitious people want, but everyone in the company want the same things. Everybody wants to be respected, rewarded and recognized, as well as to be supported and mentored. Ambitious people and those not interested in climbing the company ladder want to enjoy work and feel they are making a difference, as a part of something significant, where they are playing an important role.

The Case of the Righteous New Manager

June 1, 2015 ~ Orlando Ceaser

A promotion to management is quite an accomplishment. A new manager joins the ranks of leadership, among the most important individuals in an organization. The manager conducts the functions of planning, organizing, staffing and budgeting, to help the company achieve results and expectations. They are accountable for implementing corporate policies and strategies, as well as caring for the company’s most important resource which are its people.

New managers may possess traits that may hinder or delay the development of their teams and the rapid results they desire. Some have an attitude of righteousness, which means they feel anointed as a manager, rather than being appointed to the job.

New managers bring a fresh perspective to their assignment. They may not be mired in history, preconceived notions and the barriers and restrictions on what can’t be done. They bring drive, enthusiasm and a can do attitude along with a desire to prove that their superiors made the right choice when they were selected as the manager.

The righteousness that new managers display can be itemized as follows:

They use an autocratic management style to avoid being challenged
They try to mold people in their own image
Abuse power through favoritism and preferential treatment
Never truly left their old job

Autocratic style

The righteous new manager using the autocratic management style believes that the manager is always right. This management style is perfect for it allows some new managers to hide their insecurities. They project a feeling of superiority. They display an attitude that says they deserved the job and should not be questioned. Challenges are seen as disrespectful to their position and they are swift and deadly in their response. The righteous new manager can be detrimental to organizations, departments and teams, when they operate vanity, insecurity or sheer arrogance.

If the righteous new manager is not comfortable with her skill level, she may not want people questioning her decisions. Autocratic managers don’t want to be questioned. They are accustomed to having all the answers in their previous assignment. But they have not achieved that level of competence in their new position. They respond to inquiries, as the parent who says,” Do it because I told you to or because I said so.” They are afraid to be vulnerable and admit they don’t know everything. They view this as a sign of weakness.

I watched a new manager receive a suggestion from a member of his group who was a former manager. When the idea was proposed, he simply responded that it can’t be done and moved on to the next subject. He missed an opportunity to compliment an employee on the idea and work with the group to fashion something that was within policy. The discussion could have been very open and fruitful if he had used a more participative style of management.

Autocratic managers unwittingly shut off information, which is vital to the success of their group. Managers do not have all the answers. An environment open to challenge and scrutiny can be very beneficial. The new manager must learn how to create this environment. This will enable the manager and the team to grow immeasurably from this experience.

The autocratic management style is a very effective style in the right circumstances. There are situations when the manager has to make the call without input from their teams. However the misuse of this style can be a problem.

Mold people into your own image

The righteous new manager may be tempted to over emphasize the skills that got them promoted. They may be experts in data analysis, customer service, strategic thinking, problem solving, administration or sales. If they were a great salesperson, they will demonstrate that they can sell and expect everyone to sell as they did. Sometimes they will not allow their salespeople to sell because they are always showing them how it should be done. The magic phrase,” this is how I used to do it,” eventually undermines the team. A righteous new manager will take over the sales call to the chagrin of their salesperson and the customer.

The biggest roadblock with the righteous new manager may be the veteran employee. The variance between the new manager’s methods and the veterans experience may be the most significant challenge. The veteran employees may not have had the advantage of the new terminology and techniques and the latest training modules, but they know their jobs. They have the advantage of experience and know how to get results.

When a veteran employee is in trouble, it is up to the new manager’s superior to guide them through this delicate personnel issue. This enables the new manager to benefit from the expertise of their manager. A high producing veteran employee can be placed on the verge of resignation or termination because the new managers making their lives a living hell. I remember when the most effective salesperson was demoralized and frustrated because the righteous new manager wanted things to be done their way. This frustration affected the workers ability to do his job. Sales began to decrease and the new manager made a case that to the veteran had lost his touch and needed to be replaced.

Favoritism

The new manager may have a number of people play up to them to gain preferential treatment. We’ve already discussed situations where prior relationships may lead people to think they should be treated differently. The new manager cannot give in to this temptation. There must be a concerted effort to treat employees with the appropriate and equivalent level of attention. If someone always gets the best assignments or is always called on and applauded in the group, this can cause problems in morale nothing can undermine credibility and engagement more than preferential treatment.

There may be instances where you have a natural affinity or relationship with someone in the group due to prior history. Don’t let this circumvent your ability to lead. This is easier said than done. Sometimes when you have made a conscious effort to avoid favoritism, people may initially accuse you of it anyway. There are situations when members of your team are of the same gender, race, ethnicity, city or country of origin, fraternity / sorority, college and personality type. People will assume you have a preference, even if you have not exhibited one. This says more about them than it foes about you. Be patient and steadfast. In time people will see that you are fair in your relationships with your team and their accusations, suspicions and thoughts of favoritism will go away.

Never really left the old job

This person loves to be called on in matters related to their old assignment. They were good at that job and it was a source of confidence. There is comfort and safety and the tried and true, the familiar has its own rewards and recognition. The new assignment is not been mastered, so these good feelings from the old days provide satisfaction to their ego, but can hinder their growth in the new job. They have to cut away and devote themselves to the new position. They also have to lose the mother hen mentality and allow the replacement the room to grow in their new job.

The new manager needs validation. It is important for them to receive encouragement as well as continued instruction until the new job is mastered. Maintaining a foot in both camps may result in doing a substandard job in both positions.

New managers want to demonstrate their effectiveness as soon as possible. In most announcements, it states the effective date of the promotion, but it does not state the effective date of the manager, in regards to their skill level. The reason is obvious. No one knows the effective date, when the manager’s leadership skills are fully grown and they are fully operational. A new manager plagued with righteousness delays their effectiveness and the performance of their team

Overqualified! Is this a real concern or a convenient excuse?

February 10, 2015 ~ Orlando Ceaser

Many companies do not give interview feedback to external candidates? But, when feedback is delivered, many of the applicants will hear these dreaded words, “You are an excellent candidate, but I am afraid you are overqualified for the position.” These words, intended to placate the candidate, often leave them frustrated and disillusioned.

There are a tremendous number of talented people in search of a new job. In many instances they are willing to work in jobs that are below their educational level, income history or experience. They want to work. They want to take care of their families, pay their bills and be productive contributors to society.

There are two attitudes about people that come into play in workplace scenarios. First, everybody likes to get added value, purchase something on sale or receive a bonus and a gift that is unexpected. They want to consider themselves lucky. This also applies to personal relationships. If a potential mate is interested in them and they are more attractive, with assets beyond their imagination, they consider themselves very fortunate. They are ecstatic when they gain something that exceeds their needs and expectations.

Second, no one likes to be tricked, used, manipulated, taken advantage of, fooled or exploited. If they hire someone and before they can give them a satisfactory return on investment, they leave the organization, people are left feeling they wasted their time and resources. If people invest time in a relationship and it is severed prematurely, they are disappointed and possibly angry.

Both of these philosophical dynamics come into play when companies are interviewing to fill vacant positions.

Overqualified people

There are facts that are known prior to the interview. Interviewers know whether or not a person’s qualifications match the needs of their assignment. If the person is overqualified, they know it before the interview. If being overqualified is a knockout factor for the assignment, the person should not be invited to the interview. It is wasting their time and company time. If they are brought to the interview, the assumption is that the organization is open-minded to consider them as a temporary or permanent fit for the job.

If they are invited to the interview and rejected, here are some of the potential real concerns and convenient excuses.

Real concerns

They have too much experience, but it is the wrong experience for today and for the future
They wanted them to perform well, but they bombed the interview
They did not convince the interviewer that they really wanted to work for their organization
They could not transfer their skills and experience to the job
The amount of time necessary to train them would slow down the work teams
They told the interviewer, in so many words, they would leave the company if something else became available With real concerns, interviewers have serious doubts about the person’s interest in the assignment. The organization knows, they are only available because a job that matches their background is not ready. They want the person to be happy and productive, but they are skeptical. They do not believe the candidate is ready for the lower paying job. They don’t want to take the risk to see if they could handle it. The interviewer wanted to be sold on the fact that they were capable of making the adjustment to the new job.

Convenient excuses

The interviewer is reluctant or prohibited from giving the candidate the real reason for not selecting them
The overqualified line was given because it is the easiest explanation.
The candidate was so impressive in the interview that they were seen as a potential threat to vulnerable careers in the organization.
They like the candidate, but are afraid they would be frustrated and unhappy

Convenient excuses are used to hide the real reason for not giving someone a job. The excuses could indicate that someone was interviewed to meet a federal regulation to include certain individuals in a candidate pool. Company personnel have to be consistent when offering this explanation to candidates after the interview. When a candidate finds out that they were rejected as overqualified and other individuals with similar experiences were hired, they could cause problems.

Candidate – Overqualified Mindset

The candidate must understand the current predicament of the hiring manager. They are wrestling with the two dynamics discussed earlier; the struggle between obtaining extra value and the risk of being used by a desperate job seeker. They must recognize that the hiring manager has the following issues;

They are gauging seriousness as to whether the person really wants the job and would really stick around for a while.
The company feels the overqualified person is only interested in them because their real interests is not available.
Ask, “What do they need to hear from me, to make them comfortable enough to give me the job?”
They want to know that the job will be stimulating enough. They want them engaged and not disruptive to the team.
How can they make them feel that it is their lucky day that they are available to benefit the organization?
Convince them that they are hopeful that this opportunity will lead to something to benefit their career.
They may wonder if they are patient enough to stay with them and learn the job and contribute at a very high level.
Show them how they can add value to the organization, while broadening their skills
Demonstrate that this is a calculated move to strengthen their portfolio
Display belief in their ability to make it work, that they have thought it through and it is more than a desperate ploy, but an opportunity to show their humility while using their skills and work ethic to make a difference.

As discussed earlier, people like it when they can obtain greater value. If an organization can bring someone in the workforce that has skills above and beyond what is expected of the job and they are willing to accept the money offered and can hire them on a trial basis and groom them for greater things, it may be a risk worth taking. The hiring decision can be fraught with risk. Many times hiring a candidate who is not overqualified, can result in, them leaving shortly after being hired.

There isn’t a problem getting someone or being someone that is overqualified. The company, under the right circumstances, could use the person’s skills and experiences to enhance their organization. They could use their leadership to develop their peers. They could ideally be someone they would like to groom to fill other positions in the company down the road.

In this competitive work environment, people who are overqualified are constantly being hired, while others are being turned away. It is important for candidates to continue interviewing for the right job, and to be strategic and look at other positions to determine and how they can add value broaden their portfolio.

When individuals are told they were overqualified, this may mean they were unable to address the real concerns potentially posed by their resume. It could also be an indication that the interviewer took the easy way out and resorted to a convenient excuse.

Informants in the workplace

January 27, 2015 ~ Orlando Ceaser

Information is an essential ingredient in the leader’s decision making arsenal. There are many established, credible resources at their disposal. There is everything from company databases, computer files, the Internet and consultants to the minds of employees. The information available in the minds of employees is critical. However, there may be situations where employees are reluctant to disclose relevant information for a number of reasons.

If the environment is not perceived as safe, people are reticent to step forward with their information. There may be employee surveys and numerous forums within an organization where data is accumulated. But, there is still a need to decipher the data and provide additional perspectives. These translations and interpretations can be provided by informants in the workplace.

An informant is defined by Webster’s New Riverside University dictionary as, “one who discloses information and one who furnishes cultural or linguistic information to a researcher.” Oftentimes, informants volunteer their services. They may be guided by a number of motives. One such motive may be a genuine desire to improve the culture of the workplace or team.

Secondly, informants may be driven by ulterior motives, hoping to be rewarded in some fashion. A pharmaceutical company discontinued their bonus program which disappointed a number of their representatives. A group of employees got together and complained and expressed their dissatisfaction. The most vocal member of the group became an informant and notified leadership of the various opinions expressed. The other members were chastised and eventually the informant was promoted. The moral of this story is to express your opinion in a situation where your insight is appreciated and the person can do something about it.

Thirdly, a leader may ask everyone to be an informant. They would like to create an environment where everyone can step forward and let them know the climate of the team. The leader would like to receive the word on the street regarding a new policy or procedure, directly from the employees.

Fourthly, there are situations where a leader may select a particular person or a small group of people, who have keen insight into the workplace. They may have the ability to articulate the feelings of the team.

Lastly, there are situations where a team may identify someone as a spokesperson, a group sanctioned employee. This person is an approved voice of the people.

There is crucial information that the company must provide to the employees or members of a team, in order for the company or team to be successful. This data is around the vision, mission and the type of organization they are trying to create.

There is also crucial information possessed by the employees. The employees have the perspectives and relevant data obtained by being closest to the customer. They must share or release this information to leadership, in order for leadership to recognize the impact of their programs and strategy. The release of this information from the employee may be through the informant.

There were numerous occasions in my career where I used an informant to improve the success of a strategy, program or my leadership effectiveness. In one situation I did not realize the tension that existed between my District Managers. One manager called me and asked if I noticed the discomfort in the room. Armed with the information from her call, I scheduled a team building session where they were able to play together and resolve their differences.

Additionally, there were another time when individuals were poisoning the environment I was trying to create. There was a time when I served as a healer to address a dysfunction within a team. I brought the team members and their manager into my office for a debriefing session. After the meeting was over, I received a telephone call from one of the participants. She stated that before their drive to their territory, she heard my voice in the back seat of the car. Apparently, one of the representatives had taped my entire session with the team. This informant made me aware of either the insidious nature of the team member for their lack of trust. I was able to satisfactorily handle the situation because of the courage of my informant.

Leaders have told me of situations where members of their team smiled to their face, but tried every effort to undermine their efforts, behind their backs.

The leader must create the environment where people feel comfortable enough to tell management what they think. The manager must create a culture which is an OASIS. The OASIS (Open And Share Information Safely) is an acronym describing a concept that I introduced in my book Unlock Your Leadership Greatness (available at www.OrlandoCeaser.com and www.amazon.com. This environment will have a direct them on the number of formats available in the organization.

Informants are critical in the lives of leaders who are new to an organization or new to the role of leadership. It is comforting to have individuals who can share with you and serve as a barometer for your policies and procedures. They can also let you know how your personality comes across to the group.

Informants do not necessarily have to be spies who infiltrate an organization to gather secrets. They can be legitimate information merchants dedicated to helping leadership make better decisions.